Baseball Lingo

Baseball is such a charming game. Some people think it is the best thing going and packed with action, strategy and surprise achievements. Well, maybe. I have to choose my words carefully because there are overzealous fanatics who will not brook any criticism. Also, patriotism has a way of creeping into any discussion of the topic. On the other hand, to its credit it has evolved to modern standards of entertainment and has a treasured place in summertime activity.

Americans in general are perplexed by foreign sporting tradition and I mention the game of cricket as an example. The rules are one thing but the lingo creates another impenetrable barrier to appreciation of the sport. For those who are not familiar with baseball and are continually perplexed by its so called virtues, I have compiled a short list of terms that may help demystify some of the accounts given by savvy broadcasters.

Celeste’s Clip ‘n’ Save Guide to Baseball Lingo

Can of corn – an easily caught fly ball to the outfield.

Catbird seat – a position of unarguable advantage. Not just physical, as in the press box.

Dinger – a home run. Round all the bases and score.

Fan him – strike him out. It takes three by the way.

Full count – three balls and two strikes against a batter. A foul ball then doesn’t count.

Gas inside – a fast pitch close to the hitter. A brush back is a dangerously close one.

Go with the heat (or gas) – serve up a very fast pitch. 100 mph is not unheard of.

Johnson – a home run. I have no idea who Johnson is or was.

Off speed – a slower pitch. 70 mph is considered lethargic!

On the corners – simultaneously a runner at first base and a runner at third base.

One (two or three) aboard – number of base runners.

Paint the corners – pitches delivered close to the corners of the rectangular strike zone.

Punch out – a strike out.

Put mustard on it – a throw or a hit with energy and vigor.

Swing for the fences – muscular and aggressive batting.

Walk off home run – a game winning home run for the home team in the last inning.

Huge hugs, Celeste

A public service announcement

Have an escape plan, Celeste’s tips on emergency preparedness:

Put together a small kit for travel and be sure it includes all the cosmetics you might not be able to find “on the road”. If you use certain serums, like many of us do, it is unlikely you will be able to pop into a corner store to replenish. It is very important for your morale in the face of danger to present a planned appearance. Also it will put your fellow travelers (I hesitate to use the word evacuees, which sounds almost biological) at ease in any unexpected interactions. Don’t forget that an extra set of your best brushes will be needed.

Access to your own special hair products are extremely useful to have. Nothing could be more shocking than to go for a day and possibly more, without firm holding spray. Special tip: in an extremis survival situation I am told that they are flammable and can be used to ward off wild animals.

Set aside a proper wardrobe. No need to pack it, just set it aside in a section of your walk-in. Since you won’t know what time of day the disaster may strike, include practical selections from your daily routine. In this set aside area you may still continue to use them only be sure to replace them cleaned in the set aside when you dip into them. Don’t feel you have to alter your habiliments, except maybe to add a head covering that you might ordinarily use just for gardening or the beach. As the seasons change so should your set aside too!

Practical footwear is a must so include any casual wear you ordinarily use. For my use I have a very nice carry bag with a pair of flats, boardwalks, mules and zip boots. It is a comfort to know that they are there any time I need them. Select your own types but avoid wedges no matter how comfy they might feel. Toss in some footies too!

It goes without saying that essential medicine is a requirement. You might also add in the kit any over the counter relief aids that you usually take. My dear partner has an extensive list of such things and I make him segregate these on one side of his medicine cabinet where I placed a small plastic bag. When the time comes we could just scoop them all in one motion into the bag and be on our merry way. Et Voila!

Small food items, such as energy bars, and water deserve to be in the kit. It wouldn’t be a bad thing to include some Richart chocolate from Paris or even some dark Scharffen Berger as mood enhancers under the circumstances. They come in nice little squares.

Lastly, don’t ignore a set aside of delicates and handkerchiefs. A small flask of strained and decanted sherry wouldn’t be a bad thing either.

Hugs all around,

Celeste